Why It’s Okay to Have Bad Days (A lesson on Perspective)

It’s okay to sometimes be like, “I’m having a bad day,  I’m not feeling like myself” and just be.

This does not mean that you stay there. The key is being self-aware and mindful. Being able to acknowledge that, “this is where I am, it’s not where I wanted to be and this is not where I will stay, but right now, in this moment, this is where I am, this is how I feel and it is okay. Because I know that I am and that I will be okay.”

I haven’t always thought this way. And, often would disregard the quote that says “It’s okay not to be okay.” I’d think to myself, “what do you mean it’s okay?” But, life experiences has since shifted my perspective on this a bit.

Happiness is a choice..

I wholeheartedly believe that our own personal happiness is a choice. And, that it is up to us, whether or not, we allow people, things and circumstances to influence our overall happiness. This, accompanied by the idea that our ability to maintain a positive success “growth” mindset is key to our overall happiness and success in life. However, I have learned through various experiences over the past few years, that life is made up of a series of processes and levels.

Stick with me..

For those of us who are complex, we may need to be extra patient with ourselves when it comes to our personal growth and development, because an essential part of growth is process. Sometimes, going through the process is uncomfortable. Sometimes, it feels like nothing is happening, or as if no progress is being made. But, to endure, we must understand that it is all a part of the process. And, that process does not look the same for everybody.

Your process might not look like my process and that is okay.

During the process, you may have a moment or even an entire day where you are just not okay. And, it seems like in the world of personal development, that we’re taught that we should do things that will promote positivity and a shift in our emotions or mindset, while we are in a negative mental place. I absolutely agree with this.. However, today, I want to share an idea..

That sometimes, an essential part of our PROCESS may be to do nothing at all, but simply observe.

Be mindful and observe HOW you feel, identify WHY, what or who influenced you to feel some type of way and just be.. in the moment.

Simply observe. Allow yourself to FEEL the emotion.

Acknowledge the feeling, without adding or subtracting it’s value.

Know that the FEELING does not have to last forever if you don’t want it to. Because yes, YOU do have a choice to be or not to be happy. You CAN shift your focus and intentionally focus on things that bring you joy and happiness; to SHIFT your feeling (mood), attitude or perspective.

Remember.. that it is okay, to simply observe.

If it happens to be a part of your process, it’s okay.

Don’t feel as if you have to meditate, chant, or baptize yourself in affirmations IF you feel as if you need a minute to just hit the pause button and simply BE in the moment. Yes, even with the negative feelings/emotions.

I feel as if this take on mindset and dealing with negative emotions is taboo to some, but it’s real. Most times the meditation, prayer, affirmations, etc. will work. But, every now and then, you may discover that you just need to be mindful and ride it out.

In the process, as you observe, you remain open to lessons you can learn and perspective shifts can take place, simply because you are still.

You Don’t Have to Wait..

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Ugghh! I use to HATE hearing people say that “happiness is a choice.” I hated it. I didn’t understand how that was possible.

For 90% of my childhood, I was the shy, lonely, nerd who was just unhappy. Throughout my teenage years, I was miserable. Struggled with low self-esteem, depression.. And most of the time, I felt invisible. Sure, I laughed & smiled but deep down I wasn’t happy. So yeah, I didn’t get how happiness could possibly be a choice. I wanted to be happy. I just didn’t realize that I could be.

As a teen, I was the queen of negativity! I murmured & complained about anything and everything. I struggled to see the good in people and situations. I made MY mediocre problems bigger than they really were. I can’t pinpoint exactly when a shift occurred, but I can tell you that once the shift happened, my whole life changed.

The shift was in my mindset. Once that changed, my perspective of everything going on in my life changed. My perspective shifted & I began to see things through a more positive lense. The people & situations didn’t change, but the way I perceived them did!!

Regardless of what was going on, I became happier. I became content. I discovered my worth, passion and purpose. I found a genuine reason to be happy that wasn’t based on a particular person or thing 🙌

It’s true when they say, you can’t live a positive life with a negative mind… Check out my latest blog post for 4 ways you can transform your mindset in order to become a more positive person.

I have a new book out called Empower You! Mindset Transformation: A Daily Devotional for the Mind! It is a great read for those who are struggling with negative thinking or lack motivation. Empower You  will help you get motivated, get focused, slay your goals & to strategically align yourself with what you desire & with what you’ve been created to do in life! You can grab your copy today by clicking the link below. 

3 Ways to Live Your Best Life

3 Ways to_The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams._

Do you feel stagnant or stuck? Do you feel like you’re living life according to someone else’s blueprint? So, its as if you’re just going through the motions?

If your answer is yes, then I bet that all you really want is to get unstuck and live your best life. All you want is to be happy, successful and thrive in life! And you know what, you’re not alone. In some way, shape and form, we are all striving to attain happiness. Now, happiness doesn’t look the same for everybody, because the definition varies person to person. But, regardless of how we each define happiness, we are all in pursuit of happiness. We all want to live a fulfilled life.

When you are living your best life, you are living life on your own terms. You know who you are, you know what you want out of life and you are taking the necessary actions in order to attain what it is that you want out of life. Now, I will just tell you right now, that in order to live your best life, you have to have the right mindset. In other words, you have to believe that it is possible. That you can be happy in life and that you can live your best life, whatever that means to you.

No matter what happiness and living your best life looks like for you, there are 3 things that are essential to your ability to live your best life.

Here is what you must do:

 

 

 

1) Be Intentional about what you think, say and do, where you go and who you spend time with. What you choose to do today is an investment in  your tomorrow! Live your life on your own terms by discovering who you are and what you want out of life. Then, set goals around your desires and aspirations and take action!

2) Invest in yourself by reading self-help/personal development books, attend seminars, conferences and networking events. Place yourself in environments that allows you to expand your horizons. Meet new people and try new things on a consistent basis. These are all things that you can do to increase your knowledge and skills and will create awareness of resources that are available to you to use in order to reach your next level in life! Being your best self goes hand in hand with living your best life. Investing in yourself + investing in your dreams = being your best self and living your best life!

3) Fear-less! Do at least one thing every day that scares you or that you are initially hesitant to do. By doing this, you are conquering your fears and building your confidence. This is necessary, because living your best life, usually means living your dream life. And, to do that, most often, you have to live outside of your comfort zone! You have to think and operate outside the box and be willing to take risks. If you let fear dictate your future, then you will not live outside of your comfort zone.

By being intentional, investing in yourself and living fearlessly, you are setting yourself up for success! You have the opportunity to live your best life, now. And you can start by doing those 3 things, consistently. Create a lifestyle, rather than a habit out of doing those three things. Eventually, you will begin to see results.

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