Do This Whenever You Feel Uncomfortable, Unconfident or Inadequate..

For the past couple of weeks I have been taking time to hit the reset button and get some much needed r&r. Usually, I am always on the go and tend to keep going until I hit a wall; where I become physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted.

During my time of rest and relaxation, I have had opportunities to take part in a few activities I haven’t done in a long time and others that I have never done before. Somehow I found myself outside of my comfort zone, at times where I was not expecting to end up there. Maybe you can relate, but I have found myself having to try a little harder to shift my perspective of my comfort zone – or – in this case, lack thereof. I mean, I’ve literally had to pause, walk and talk myself through the process of shifting my mindset.

Many people are comfortable with their negative mindset/perspective. But, to truly grow and evolve as a person, we must be willing to shift our mindsets and adapt; to enable personal growth and development in uncomfortable experiences.

I’ve gotten a really late start, but over the past 3 years, I’ve really come to loooove Marvel and DC movies and shows. I’ve always wished I had a super power.. But, what I am realizing is that WE already have a super power. Like some of our Superhero faves, who did not discover or come to terms with their powers until they were teenagers or young adults; we have a power that many of us have not discovered or come to terms with yet. Our super power is our MIND and our ability to SHIFT.

So what, we can’t shape-shift or run at super human speed? We have a power that literally can change the trajectory of our lives IF we know how to use it.. yes, to our advantage. Often, when I am outside of my comfort zone, naturally, I feel uncomfortable, unconfident and inadequate. But lately, I’ve been pressing pause and walking myself through the process of shifting my mindset, so that I am focusing less on WHAT I can’t do very well and focusing on what I CAN and have done well.

Y’all, I have found myself tripping up and making mistakes on trivial things, things that I have done many times before AND some things that I’ve never done before. The trip up has not necessarily been in the mistake I made or embarrassment it caused, but rather the fact that I was impatient and disappointed in myself for not excelling. Before beating myself up about it mentally, I hit pause and remind myself that..

  1. It’s okay to try hard and still mess up, many things, over and over again
  2. It’s okay to NOT be perfect
  3. It’s okay to be good at SOME things and not everything. OR, one or two things instead of many things
  4. It’s better to be authentically you and stay in your lane, no matter how uncomfortable it may be at times
  5. Your superpower is your mental ability to leverage being comfortable IN uncomfortable situations
  6. Your super is also your imperfection

I’ve literally had to tell myself at times, “So what, you may not be good at a lot of things, but it is super valuable, just the two or three things that you do VERY well.”

When you find yourself feeling uncomfortable, unconfident or inadequate, heres’ what you should do:

  1. Be patient with yourself
  2. Be consistent in going through the process to SHIFT
  3. Celebrate the small wins too!
  4. Give yourself as many pep talks as you need

Use your super power: your mind. It is so much more powerful than you realize. I encourage you to research and study the power of YOUR mind AND your thoughts. Use your mind; and more specifically to change your life; beginning with the negative thoughts you think consistently about uncomfortable things you experience. When a negative thought comes to mind, replace it with a positive thought. Do this, over and over again. Practice mindfulness and meditation, listen to binaural beats as you sleep, detox and eat clean, stay active and surround yourself with positive minded people.. All these things help us to have a more positive perspective of ourselves and of the challenging and uncomfortable situations we experience.

Stay positive minded & stay safe out there. Keep chasing & manifesting those dreams!

5 Steps to Bouncing Back

For the past 8 days I have felt exhausted; physically, mentally and emotionally.

Not only have I felt exausted, but I’ve felt uninspired and a lack of motivation.

When I experience this, I like to take a step back and rest. I’ve used more hours of PTO than I’d like to admit. But, you know, I’ve been feeling burnt out and like I just need a nice, long vacation. LOL. Haven’t you felt this way before?

Of course, we all have.. Or, will at some point. And, that is why self-care is so important and so necessary. Especially in the high-stress days we are living in now. There are so many things in our world Sometimes you’ll have to walk yourself through the process of shifting your perspective. I rehearse the point of prioritizing self-care on a consistent basis, even as a part of your daily routine, but it helps to combat feeling burnt out.

Step 1

Realize that IT is a feeling and that YOU have control over this feeling.

Step 2

Shut it down. Log off the social media pages, turn off the T.V., put your cellphone on silent or do not disturb and distance yourself from anyone or anything that you consider toxic to your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. It’s time to shut it all done. Temporarily of course.

Step 3

Take a step back. Take time away from your “To – Do List.” And, I put this in quotations, because, maybe you don’t have an actual to-do list written out, but I’m sure you have a schedule or thing that you make sure to get done everyday. Whether it’s someone or something.. If you’ve felt stressed, unmotivated to do a certain task or have found yourself procrastinating, that may be something you want to take a step back from. Hit the pause button and take a moment to rest.

Step 4

Self-care. Self-care doesn’t look the same for everybody. Maybe it’s taking a few days off of work to read, meditate and have a family stay-cation. Or, maybe it’s hopping on a plane and flying out of the country for awhile. Maybe it’s having a spa day by yourself or with family. Maybe it’s turning off the alarm and sleeping all day. Self-care is time that you should use to rest, relax, detox, recharge and reset. TIP: Incorporate acts of self-care into your daily routine. Don’t wait until you feel stressed or burnt out to make self-care a priority. It is essential to your well-being and enhances your ability to bounce back!

Step 5

Take action. If you have gone through the process of taking steps 1 through 4, and you still feel burnt out, you have to make a conscious decision to take action! You can’t sit back and wait until you feel ready or motivated to jump back in. Sometimes, you’ve got to dip your foot in the water and get a taste of what it feels like to do what you love to do. And, once you get going you’ll begin to gain momentum. The key is to get started AND to keep going.

It’s okay to push yourself AFTER you have taken time to rest and recharge.

The passion that was once burning on the inside of you is still lit. It’s still there. But, sometimes, you have to give it a jump start. Sometimes, you will have to jump off the cliff and trust that the parachute will open.

We all experience burn out from time to time. In fact, I write about this topic at least once a year. It reminds me that it’s okay. And, really, it’s just a part of the process of setting and slaying my goals. I’ve been putting in work, chasing my goals, and when you add all the emotional stressors of life.. from the pandemic to protests, and all the challenges in my own business and personal relationships… It can get overwhelming. Sometimes, I have to remind myself that it’s okay to slow down or in fact, hit the pause button and rest. The same goes for you my friend. It’s okay to hit the pause button and rest.

Peace & Blessings to you. Thanks for reading!

How to Silence Your Inner Critic

You’ve heard it before..

That we can be our own worst enemy

And, maybe you’re experiencing it right now

Struggling to turn down or turn off the negative voice inside your heard

Telling you that you aren’t ready, that you aren’t worthy or qualified

Telling you that maybe you just aren’t good enough

Telling you that you don’t have what it takes, that you should give up and try something else.

It sucks having to battle negative thoughts when you’re trying to pursue BIG + IMPOSSIBLE looking dreams. You know it’s possible.. But, then those negative thoughts bombard your mind and you feel like maybe it’s possible for everybody but YOU.

I know what it’s like. I’ve been there so many times. But, one thing I can definitely say, is that it has gotten EASIER to WIN the challenges my inner critic presents to me, because of a few things that I starting doing and continue to do on the regular.

Today, I want to share with you practical things that you can do to silence your inner critic.

“Your inner critic re-affirms untruths about yourself that you have internalized to be true.”

1

Understand your inner critic. Recognize your inner critic for what IS and what it can be. For most people, the inner critic comes as a form of self-sabotage. It can transform into low self-esteem and a lack of confidence. Often, it leaves us feeling unworthy and less than qualified. However, your inner critic CAN be a tool that YOU use to internally CRITIQUE your actions and progress. Use it to your benefit to INVEST in yourself and in your personal growth and development. I believe that we should always remain in a state of humbleness that will allow us to see our failures and mistakes as opportunities to LEARN and therefore grow and evolve as people. Allow your inner critic to work for you rather than against you.

2

Understand the POWER that you have over your inner critic. SHIFT your perspective of your inner critic and use it to you ADVANTAGE. Whenever you make a mistake or identify an imperfection, shift your perspective to see if as a learning opportunity to evolve and grow as person. See, it as an opportunity to attract people, opportunities and experiences to you that are ideal FOR you.

3

Understand WHO you are and who God has created you to be.

Ephesians 2:10

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Psalms 139:14

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Romans 8:37

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Philippians 4:13

 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

4

Affirm yourself – Write and speak positive affirmations daily.

5

Be mindful of what you feed yourself; physically and mentally. What you allow yourself to entertain on a consistent basis is what will water the seeds that have already been planted. It’s up to you to uproot the weeds and plant better seeds. It’s up to you to water them with positivity, which comes in many forms, and is not simply an affirmation.

6

Practice positive self-talk. You are the story you tell yourself. What you tell yourself everyday will either lift you up or tear you down. Empower yourself!

7

Analyze and compare who you compare yourself to. The persons or businesses you may compare yours/yourself to may not be the same as those you look up to, learn from or idolize. If your perception of them causes you to belittle who you are and what you are capable of, it may be toxic to your mindset. You can take action by un-following or limiting the amount of exposure you have to them/it.

8

Be patient with yourself. Walk yourself through the process of SHIFTING your mindset by: Redirecting your thoughts which is done by changing what you focus on consistently. And then, practice positive self-talk by affirming yourself. “Respond to it’s (inner critic) grievances from a detached perspective” (Psychology Today, Jenna E Pincott, 3/2019). Even if you’re doubting yourself or don’t FEEL it, speak it aloud – quote the affirmation with conviction and authority! This is how you affirm yourself.

9

Keep going! Your inner critic only has the power that YOU give it. So, acknowledge it, use it to your advantage and don’t give up on yourself. Keep going! Learn from the experience and try again.

Make moves to silence your inner critic BEFORE your inner critic presents a challenge.

Implementing and practicing the tips shared above, on a consistent basis, will allow you to more easily and effectively combat your inner critic when it comes to challenge you.

How to Reprogram Your Mind for Success

In the days we are living in now, it is beneficial, now more than ever before, to have a healthy mindset. Soo many people are dealing with mental health challenges such as depression and anxiety. As a mental health advocate, and someone who has worked in the field with both children, teenagers and adults, I’ve seen how imperative it is to develop healthy habits that will support and influence positive mental and emotional health.

There are things that we all should be doing on a consistent basis to create and maintain a healthy life balance; mental, emotional, physical, spiritual and financial. Today, I want to tackle mental and emotional health.. many of which will have a positive effect on your life physically, spiritually and financially as well.

Today, I am going to share with you 2 things that you can START doing NOW, to reprogram your mind for success in every area of your life. As always, these tips are most effective when you do them consistantly. By reprogramming your mindset, you can: Become more confident, develop a positive success mindset and become more aware and open to opportunities you would be closed off to otherwise.

2 Ways to Start Reprogramming Your Mind Now

1

Get a sheet of paper and fold it in half, hot dog style. On the left half, MAKE A LIST of your most common/reoccurring negative thoughts about yourself AND about your life.

THEN, for each negative thought or limiting belief, CREATE a positive affirmation and write it directly across from the negative thought, on the right side. READ through your list, first the negative and then the positive, line by line, EVERYDAY. This will help enhance your awareness. After awhile, you will begin to become aware of the thought as soon as it crosses your mind. WHEN this happens, be sure to pause, acknowledge the thought and then replace it with the positive affirmation. SPEAK the affirmation aloud with authority and conviction. You may not believe the affirmation in the beginning, but over time, you will.

A huge part of changing or shifting your mindset, so you can change your life IS shifting your perspective of life’s circumstances. BUT this exercise will help you to SHIFT your perspective of yourself first. And why not? When, you ARE The creator of your reality, as God has blessed you with freedom of choice, right?

2

LISTEN to positive affirmations while you are asleep. Start by doing a 5 or 10 minute meditation, or longer if you’d like, before you drift off to sleep. After your meditation, set your affirmations to play while you sleep throughout the night.This is great accompanied by binaural beats. Lastly, when you awake, meditate for 5 to 10 minutes.

When doing this step, I encourage you to create a YouTube playlist. That way you can choose specific guided meditations and affirmations to listen to and can put them in the order you like and it will be ready to go when you are. You can always create multiple playlists or add/remove whenever you want, as amazing meditations are added to YouTube often. Also, when you hit play from within the playlist you won’t have to worry about it stopping after the first video finishes.

In our daily lives, we operate using our CONSCIOUS mind. However, our SUBCONSCIOUS mind is the driving force behind what we think and do habitually. So, we want to REPROGRAM our subconsious mind to develope healthy thinking and living habits. By listenting to positive affirmations while you sleep, your subconcious mind is doing all the heavy lifting, reprogramming itself.

These are by far the TOP 2 strategies I recommend when it comes to reprogramming your mindset. You will not only begin to THINK better, but you will begin to FEEL better about yourself and about your life as well. Remember, when you change your mindset, you can change your life!

Thanks for reading! Please share with someone who can use this information today.

How to Unplug and Hit Reset on 2020

You said 2020 was going to be your year . The year you will finally take a leap of faith and pursue your dreams. But so far, most of us wish we could unplug 2020, wait 20 seconds and plug it back in again. I mean, on top of our own excuses, Jan – March alone has given us a few more reason to feel discourage and to procrastinate.

But, I encourage you to consider this..

You CAN unplug and hit the reset button on 2020.

Yes, you read that right. You can unplug and hit the reset button on 2020.. It begins with YOU make a conscious decision to SHIFT your mindset.

You can shift your MINDSET by:

1) Changing your focus. Focus more on the positive things in life and less on the negative .

HOW:

  • Set limits. LIMIT the amount of time you allow yourself to indulge in the news via social media and television.
  • While practicing social distancing, THINK about the individuals and environments in your life that are TOXIC and consider how you have distance yourself from those people or environments even after this current challenge has calmed.
  • JOURNAL daily to help you release, become aware of and to process your thoughts and emotions.
  • MEDITATE daily to help gain CLARITY and CONTROL aka AWARENESS of your thoughts. That way, you will recognize when negative thoughts bombard your mind and then replace it with a positive thought. And then, in that moment, continue to meditate on that positive thought.

Shifting your mindset is really just shifting your focus, by shifting your thoughts, over and over again. It sounds like an easy concept at surface level, but please hear me on this.. It takes work. It takes consistantcy. Sometimes, you have to do the DIRTY work to gain leverage over NEGATIVE thoughts.

If you find yourself struggle with the same negative thoughts/limiting beliefs, here’s what I suggest you do:

  1. Make a list of reoccurring negative thoughts and limiting beliefs
  2. For each thought/belief, write down a positive AFFIRMATION that you will remember. Write out that affirmation EVERY day for the next 21 days.
  3. Every time that negative thought or belief comes to mind, repeat the affirmation to yourself 10 times. When your first starting at, I encourage quoting the affirmation out load when possible. If the negative thought or limiting belief is about YOU specifically, rather than a particular situation/scenario, practice quoting the affirmations to yourself as you look at your reflection in the mirror. Another idea you can try; record yourself repeating the affirmations 10+ times and then listen to the recordings as you meditate (use headphones for best experience).

The more you do this, the EASIER it will become to RECOGNIZE (awareness) the negative thoughts/limiting beliefs and to COMBAT it.

To hit the RESET button on 2020, we must shift our THINKING/PERSPECTIVE of ourselves and of 2020.. IF you shift your mindset, you’ll be able to see the OPPORTUNITIES that may come as a result of the challenges we have and currently are facing. For example, many people have had a SIDE-HUSTLE or business idea that they’ve been wanting to start, but have yet to start because of their limiting belief that they CAN’T because they don’t have enough time. Those who have shifted there focus enough to see an opportunity have already started working on their business idea because they SEE the opportunity of TIME. Even if temporary, they have time NOW to START and to strategize a plan that will allow them to continue their pursuit AFTER things begin to return back to normal.

The fact is, we are living in chaotic, uncomfortable and uncertain times. BUT, even in this there is still HOPE and OPPORTUNITY. If you make the decide to shift your mindset, you will see it.

Thanks for reading! Like, Share, Comment & Tag a Friend who needs this encouragement today.