Why It’s Okay to Have Bad Days (A lesson on Perspective)

It’s okay to sometimes be like, “I’m having a bad day,  I’m not feeling like myself” and just be.

This does not mean that you stay there. The key is being self-aware and mindful. Being able to acknowledge that, “this is where I am, it’s not where I wanted to be and this is not where I will stay, but right now, in this moment, this is where I am, this is how I feel and it is okay. Because I know that I am and that I will be okay.”

I haven’t always thought this way. And, often would disregard the quote that says “It’s okay not to be okay.” I’d think to myself, “what do you mean it’s okay?” But, life experiences has since shifted my perspective on this a bit.

Happiness is a choice..

I wholeheartedly believe that our own personal happiness is a choice. And, that it is up to us, whether or not, we allow people, things and circumstances to influence our overall happiness. This, accompanied by the idea that our ability to maintain a positive success “growth” mindset is key to our overall happiness and success in life. However, I have learned through various experiences over the past few years, that life is made up of a series of processes and levels.

Stick with me..

For those of us who are complex, we may need to be extra patient with ourselves when it comes to our personal growth and development, because an essential part of growth is process. Sometimes, going through the process is uncomfortable. Sometimes, it feels like nothing is happening, or as if no progress is being made. But, to endure, we must understand that it is all a part of the process. And, that process does not look the same for everybody.

Your process might not look like my process and that is okay.

During the process, you may have a moment or even an entire day where you are just not okay. And, it seems like in the world of personal development, that we’re taught that we should do things that will promote positivity and a shift in our emotions or mindset, while we are in a negative mental place. I absolutely agree with this.. However, today, I want to share an idea..

That sometimes, an essential part of our PROCESS may be to do nothing at all, but simply observe.

Be mindful and observe HOW you feel, identify WHY, what or who influenced you to feel some type of way and just be.. in the moment.

Simply observe. Allow yourself to FEEL the emotion.

Acknowledge the feeling, without adding or subtracting it’s value.

Know that the FEELING does not have to last forever if you don’t want it to. Because yes, YOU do have a choice to be or not to be happy. You CAN shift your focus and intentionally focus on things that bring you joy and happiness; to SHIFT your feeling (mood), attitude or perspective.

Remember.. that it is okay, to simply observe.

If it happens to be a part of your process, it’s okay.

Don’t feel as if you have to meditate, chant, or baptize yourself in affirmations IF you feel as if you need a minute to just hit the pause button and simply BE in the moment. Yes, even with the negative feelings/emotions.

I feel as if this take on mindset and dealing with negative emotions is taboo to some, but it’s real. Most times the meditation, prayer, affirmations, etc. will work. But, every now and then, you may discover that you just need to be mindful and ride it out.

In the process, as you observe, you remain open to lessons you can learn and perspective shifts can take place, simply because you are still.

How to Unplug and Hit Reset on 2020

You said 2020 was going to be your year . The year you will finally take a leap of faith and pursue your dreams. But so far, most of us wish we could unplug 2020, wait 20 seconds and plug it back in again. I mean, on top of our own excuses, Jan – March alone has given us a few more reason to feel discourage and to procrastinate.

But, I encourage you to consider this..

You CAN unplug and hit the reset button on 2020.

Yes, you read that right. You can unplug and hit the reset button on 2020.. It begins with YOU make a conscious decision to SHIFT your mindset.

You can shift your MINDSET by:

1) Changing your focus. Focus more on the positive things in life and less on the negative .

HOW:

  • Set limits. LIMIT the amount of time you allow yourself to indulge in the news via social media and television.
  • While practicing social distancing, THINK about the individuals and environments in your life that are TOXIC and consider how you have distance yourself from those people or environments even after this current challenge has calmed.
  • JOURNAL daily to help you release, become aware of and to process your thoughts and emotions.
  • MEDITATE daily to help gain CLARITY and CONTROL aka AWARENESS of your thoughts. That way, you will recognize when negative thoughts bombard your mind and then replace it with a positive thought. And then, in that moment, continue to meditate on that positive thought.

Shifting your mindset is really just shifting your focus, by shifting your thoughts, over and over again. It sounds like an easy concept at surface level, but please hear me on this.. It takes work. It takes consistantcy. Sometimes, you have to do the DIRTY work to gain leverage over NEGATIVE thoughts.

If you find yourself struggle with the same negative thoughts/limiting beliefs, here’s what I suggest you do:

  1. Make a list of reoccurring negative thoughts and limiting beliefs
  2. For each thought/belief, write down a positive AFFIRMATION that you will remember. Write out that affirmation EVERY day for the next 21 days.
  3. Every time that negative thought or belief comes to mind, repeat the affirmation to yourself 10 times. When your first starting at, I encourage quoting the affirmation out load when possible. If the negative thought or limiting belief is about YOU specifically, rather than a particular situation/scenario, practice quoting the affirmations to yourself as you look at your reflection in the mirror. Another idea you can try; record yourself repeating the affirmations 10+ times and then listen to the recordings as you meditate (use headphones for best experience).

The more you do this, the EASIER it will become to RECOGNIZE (awareness) the negative thoughts/limiting beliefs and to COMBAT it.

To hit the RESET button on 2020, we must shift our THINKING/PERSPECTIVE of ourselves and of 2020.. IF you shift your mindset, you’ll be able to see the OPPORTUNITIES that may come as a result of the challenges we have and currently are facing. For example, many people have had a SIDE-HUSTLE or business idea that they’ve been wanting to start, but have yet to start because of their limiting belief that they CAN’T because they don’t have enough time. Those who have shifted there focus enough to see an opportunity have already started working on their business idea because they SEE the opportunity of TIME. Even if temporary, they have time NOW to START and to strategize a plan that will allow them to continue their pursuit AFTER things begin to return back to normal.

The fact is, we are living in chaotic, uncomfortable and uncertain times. BUT, even in this there is still HOPE and OPPORTUNITY. If you make the decide to shift your mindset, you will see it.

Thanks for reading! Like, Share, Comment & Tag a Friend who needs this encouragement today.