The Truth About Perspective

One of the realist quotes I’ve ever heard, simply states that reality is a question of perspective. The concept of perspective has become increasingly intriguing to me over the past year. This due to a combination of life experiences and a heightened awareness of my thoughts, emotions and ability to adapt in new and challenging situations.

2 years ago I was struggling with suicidal ideations. I wanted to escape the pain and anxiety I was experiencing. I was depressed, burnt out and felt no one would notice or miss me if I was just suddenly gone. 2 years later, I’m alive, healthy and happy overall. And blessed to be celebrating my 27th birthday today. My birthday shenanigans consist of self reflection, relaxation, mindfulness and writing this blog post of course.

I can’t help but think about EVERYTHING I have and everything that I have become over the years. I am so grateful for life. Because, my perspective of my life and life in general was so negative. I’m thankful not just for the petty and superficial things, but I’m so much more aware of things like.. Peace of mind, creativity and opportunity.

“Your perspective will either become your prison or your passport.”

– Steven Furtick

My entire life has changed over the past 5 years, and even more-so over the past 2 years, because my entire PERSPECTIVE of myself and life has shifted. I always say that MINDSET is everything. Our mindset is really just our perspective of ALL things. The beautiful things about shifting your mindset/perspective is that the things around you will begin to shift as well. How? Because, when your mindset changes, your actions begin to align with that new way of thinking. My life has began to change.. and it’s a beautiful thing.

I have come from a place of wanting to end my life to wanting to LIVE. Not just be present and going through the motions of life, but to really LIVE. To show up and be authentically me, to the fullest without shame or apology. I believe this is how we all should live.

Getting to this place is really a place of mental peace and stability. This is the greatest blessing I have. And, there’s many different levels and things that factored or contributed to this. But, the biggest factor was recognizing, understanding and embracing/accepting who I am AND who GOD has created me to be.

We are more than potential. We were each created on purpose,with purpose. Every challenge, positive and negative challenge we experience in life comes to push and position us, so that we may be in alignment with our purpose. It’s like, if we’re not in the right place at the right time, we’ll miss the OPPORTUNITY to operate in our God given purpose.

Opportunity is not hidden. It is everywhere. It is out in the open. But, often times, we miss opportunities because we are not prepared; we’re not in position. We’re not in alignment. Sometimes we think the opportunities either don’t exist, aren’t for us or are hidden. But, this really isn’t the case at all. Really, it’s just that, figuratively speaking, our heads are turned, looking in the wrong direction, so we just don’t see it. How can we solve this? By shifting our perspective.

The difference between where I was 2 years ago and where I am today is that I have shifted my overall perspective of who I am and why I AM here. And, with that, I have begun to take strategic action that aligns with my LIFE PURPOSE.

I am on a mission to empower creative women to clarify, set and slay their BIG + IMPOSSIBLE looking dreams! I want to help you achieve your goals and live your life operating in your God given purpose. That is my purpose.

What is your life purpose? How can you fulfill your purpose and live your life operating in that purpose, daily?

Check out my products and services; to see how we can work together to bring your dreams to life!

I love you all. PEACE, BLESSINGS & HAPPY MANIFESTING!

3 Steps to Combating & Conquering Perfectionism: So You Can Stop Waiting and Start Slaying Your Goals

Is perfectionism preventing you from achieving your goal?

Maybe you’ve been wanting to publish your first book or launch your first business. Maybe, you been thinking about starting a podcast or changing careers.

Whatever your dream is, you’ve been putting it off because you don’t feel like you are ready, qualified or good enough. Or, you don’t believe your product or service is PERFECT.

The first thing I want you to know, is that I understand. So, everything I am sharing with you today, comes from a place of personal experience.

I’ve been blessed to write and publish 3 books, start a business and changed careers, less than 1 year ago, all of that, while being an over-thinker. I over think almost EVERYTHING; especially when it comes to potentially LIFE CHANGING decisions.

Not only that, but I love to PLAN. I get almost as much enjoyment in the process of planning as I do, the final result. However, therein lies the opportunity to overthink which for me, often leads to wanting to perfect whatever the task is at hand.

In order to reach the stage of RELEASE, I had to learn to push past my FEARS of IMPERFECTION and release my self and my gifts.

If you want to combat and conquer PERFECTIONISM you are going to RELEASE.

You must give yourself permission to be great. No one can do this for you.

Of course, it’s sounds simple, but there’s a few things you’ll need to do so that you CAN release, combat and conquer!

Tip #1

KNOW YOUR WHY. Here are two questions that you should ask yourself:

What is my WHY factor? (My overall reason for doing what I do)

Is my why BIG enough?

Your WHY should be greater than your insecurities and your limiting belief; any reason you use to justify not taking action… not stepping out on faith, not launching the biz or book, not stepping outside of your comfort zone and going for what you really want.

If your WHY is not big enough, then go back to the drawing board and list ALL the ways that you accomplishing your goal will impact you, those you love AND what will happen IF you do not accomplish your goal.

The benefit of knowing your WHY and having a WHY that is greater than your desire for perfection is that it will motivate you to KEEP GOING. You WHY should motivate you! It should persuade you to take strategic action!

Tip #2

FIND AN ACCOUNTABILITY PARTNER. In January, I joined a mentorship program so that I can 1) Be mentored by someone who is already levels above me, doing and succeeding at what I desire to do AND 2) To be surrounded by like-minded individuals, who are more-so on my level, but are striving to higher heights as well. With this mentorship program comes assignments, meetings, deadlines and social interaction. Altogether, this works to hold ME accountable to the goals that I set at the start and am working toward. We hold each other accountable and my mentor, the coach, holds me accountable as well. I share all that to say this, find yourself SOMEONE; be it, a coach, a mentor, a friend or family member.. Find someone to hold you accountable for your actions or non-actions as it pertains to the pursuit of your goals. Find someone who will not only tell you what you WANT to hear, but what you NEED to hear as well. This could be a game-changer for those of you who having been going at your goals without a support system.

Tip # 3

SHIFT YOUR PERSPECTIVE. The ultimate key to combating perfectionism IS shifting your perception of your imperfection.

I know, here I go again talking about shifting your MINDSET. But, literally, I talk about it all the time, because it is the game-changer for just about everything in life. Most importantly, your ability to achieve your goals.

So, what you want to do is shift your perception, so that you see your imperfection, problem or disadvantage for what it can be.

See your disadvantage as an advantage. And advantage to attract YOUR ideal audience or clients. An advantage to be relatable. See it as an ASSET.

It can be the one thing that makes you stand out or noticeable in a crowd or in an oversaturated market. And, it can be what ATTRACTS what is ideal for you, to you… Ideal clients, ideal opportunities, connections, etc.

It CAN be, IF you SHIFT your perception, embrace the flaws and allow it to WORK for you!

Your IMPERFECTION could very well be your superpower.

For more tips & strategies on slaying your goals, I encourage you to read my blog on tackling limiting beliefs. This is beneficial to getting to the root issue of perfectionism and taking steps to conquering it.

Thank you for reading! Share with someone who needs this.

Goal Achievement: How to Get Started and Stop Stopping

You’ve got this BIG dream that you’ve been pursuing but for some reason you have not made the progress you were hoping you would’ve by now. It’s May, and you’re beginning to feel a bit discouraged. You want to achieve your goals, but you keep stopping. You started out strong and then along the way you loss momentum, you slowed down and became inconsistent. You’ve reached a point where you’re considering giving up entirely.. You’ve have thoughts like: Maybe I’m just not cut out for this. Maybe it’s not meant for me after all..

I know it doesn’t look good right now! You’ve experienced a setback and it’s hard to envision yourself bouncing back. But hear me on this.. 2020 is still YOUR year! Your GOAL is still worth pursuing. And, you are STILL more than capable! You were created with PURPOSE and God has a divine plan for your life. The Corona-virus or any other setback cannot CANCEL God’s will for your life. He has plans to give you a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29: 11 – 13). The setback you are experiencing in your life is temporary. Delayed does not mean denied. God gave you that passion and assigned purpose to your life. Don’t count yourself out, because you’ve slowed down or contemplated stopping. If you’ve stopped, it’s not too late to begin again.

I’m not here to just motivate or encourage you. I am here to give you practical tips for creating a SHIFT in your life. You don’t have to STOP. Here’s what you can do to KEEP going.

The top reasons people STOP or FAIL to START are:

Fear

Perfectionism

Waiting for a right time

AND

Not having an action plan/strategy

Some of us STOP or fail to get started often because of a combination of reasons. Maybe it’s fear or perfectionism.. But, I believe it is most commonly combined with not having the RIGHT PLAN. Not having the right plan is like having a destination in mind, somewhere you’ve never traveled before and just idoly wandering with no clue as to how you’re going to get there. Here this! YOU OWE IT TO YOURSELF TO DO MORE THAN “JUST WINGING IT” when it comes to the pursuit of your dreams.

A real plan is when you have identified where you’re going, what you need to get there, how you’re going to get there and what you will do if/when something doesn’t quite go as plan A.. what is your plan B, C or D. Check out some of my past blog posts where we break down setting strategic goals and creating a plan of action.

You can create a strategy that will help you to STOP stopping OR that will encourage you START!

Here’s how:

1

IF you really want to STOP stopping, the first thing you need to do is go back to the drawing board and ask yourself these questions:

Does my goal reflect my dream?

Remember, your goal(s) are just a break down (steps) leading towards the ultimate dream (the big picture). If your goals are not in alignment with the ultimate dream, then you are just doing “busy work” that will lead to burnout and lack of motivation very quickly.

Is my goal big enough?

What is my WHY factor? (Why do I want to achieve this goal? What will happen if I do not achieve this goal? What will happen/change WHEN I achieve my goal?)

2

Figure out why you keep stopping. Take time to analyze where you are at, why you keep stopping and then for each reason, brainstorm possible alternate routes/solutions. You should never give up on you goals without exploring other options first.

3

Create a support system by:

Getting an accountability partner, coach or mentor.

AND

Utilizing calendars/planers, habit trackers or lists and write out your goals daily, to remind you of your goals and to hold yourself accountable.

In the upcoming blogs, we will tackle the top reasons many people STOP or fail to start, i.e. fear, procrastination, perfectionism, etc.

By completing each of the steps above, you can CREATE a STRATEGY to slay your goals without STOPPING. And, life happens, so if you do stop, if you create the RIGHT plan, you should feel comfortable enough to pick-up where you left off and keep going.

I’m just trying to help someone to KEEP GOING, because I know it gets rough and tough out here sometimes. WE are all experiencing setbacks in these uncertain times and have had to pivot and adjust to what is quickly becoming our new normal.

It may not be easy to start OR to keep going, but I promise you, with the RIGHT strategy you CAN and when you do, it will be worth it!

You don’t have to chase your goals alone! I am here to offer accountability and support as your set and slay your BIG + Impossible looking goals. It is possible IF you have the Right mindset, Right goal and the Right strategy. Ready to create the strategy you need to set goals and slay? Click HERE to learn more about Goal Success Strategy Sessions.

How to Adjust to Your New Normal, Without Quitting Your Goals

This pandemic has effected us in so many ways. It has forced us as to adjust to a new normal. Even though our new normal is temporary, it’s safe to say, there are some aspects of our day to day living that will never be the same. Right now, most of us are living outside of our comfort zones, because we have to. Some of us have found ourselves in scenarios where we have to think outside of the box. We are all being impacted by Covid-19 in some type of way.

Aside from the obvious impacts economically, physically and socially, this pandemic has impacted individuals as it relates to their goals. Many of us began the year off feeling motivated and optimistic about the exciting opportunities 2020 would bring! However, many of us are now looking at our dreams and feel hopeless, because of everything that is going on in our world today. And while, even I, as a Goal Success Coach harp on how essential it is to anticipate and plan for potential setbacks upfront, none of us could have anticipated such a disturbance such as this coronavirus. I get it. I’m in this thing too. I came into 2020 with high hopes and big dreams and this pandemic as definitely disrupted my plans and has had me feeling a little.. lost.

Despite how discouraged this setback has caused me to feel at times, I am not giving up on my 2020 goals and I encourage you not to as well. Instead of giving up on your dreams, pivot.. You can get to your destination, but you’re going to have to take another route. My friend, there is opportunity in taking an alternative route. Even if it’s the long way, that simply means there’s more opportunities to learn and grow from. Shift your focus so that you can see this as a blessing in disguise.

Don’t give up on your 2020 Goals.. Instead, Pivot. Take time to shift your mindset and focus your attention on your action plan. This will allow you to become aware of opportunities that you would not see otherwise.

Step 1: Pause. Be still and breath. Allow yourself to feel the emotions; cry if you need, scream if you need to. Just be in the moment and feel. Feel the frustration, the discouragement, the anxiety.. Accept the moment for what it is.. A moment, that will eventually pass, making way for more positive and enjoyable emotions. A great way to pause is by meditating or practicing mindfulness.

Step 2: Identify alternative routes; solutions and resources. Go back to the drawing board.. that’s your vision board, your vision book, your written goals and plan of action. Explore different options, see what you need to adjust. Don’t give up on your goal just because plan A didn’t go as planned.

Take time re-adjust. Re-adjust your attitude, your mindset and your plan!

Going forward, when you set your goals and create your action plans, create in with FLEXIBILITY in mind. Meaning that you identify possible limitations and limiting beliefs upfront. Identify possible solutions, alternative and resources that may come in handy. Anticipate possible setbacks and disruptions so that your plan of action is setback and disruption-proof!

Don’t give up on your 2020 goals! We still have 3 quarters left in the year. This is the time where you should be reflecting on quarter 1 and re-adjusting as needed, anyway!

Wishing you a happy and productive week! Stay prayerful, stay safe, stay healthy. Blessings to you all!

Conquer Your Limiting Beliefs

The human mind is a battle field. Every day we are tempted with negative thoughts and challenging situations. Some days we fight and conquer, other days we succumb. Many people live day to day without the realization that it is up to them to fight and conquer their limitations and limiting beliefs.

IF we want to SLAY our goals, we must make the conscious decision to confront and conquer our limitations and limiting beliefs, every day.

I am going to share with you HOW you can begin to SHIFT and TRANSFORM your mindset; from a negative to a positive success “growth” mindset, that will position you to confront and conquer your limitations and limiting belief.

A limitation is anything that serves as an excuse, to justify not taking strategic action to pursue your goals. Example: I don’t have enough time or money to start my business.

Limiting beliefs are negative thoughts that you allow to justify not taking strategic action to pursue your goals. Example: I am not good enough or qualified for people to take me seriously.

Here are the facts about Limitations & Limiting Beliefs:

We ALL battle negative thoughts and challenging situations everyday.

It is within our control to combat negative thoughts and to perceive our challenging situations in a positive way.

It is possible, but it also takes practice to attain and maintain a positive mindset and optimistic perspective in life.

A positive success “growth” mindset and an optimistic perspective in life WILL help you attract and take action (steps) that are in direct alignment with the goals you wish to achieve. It will also help you ATTRACT more positive opportunities and experiences into your life.

No matter how positive/optimistic you are, you will still confront negative thoughts and challenging situations. BUT you will be better equipt to GROW through it, because of the positive success “growth” mindset that you have.

A positive success “growth” mindset will allow you to SEE your challenges (negative situations), setbacks, etc. as a learning opportunity, as a setup in disguise, an opportunity to recalibrate, to realign and more.

You decide, each time you are faced with a negative thought or challenging situation, whether or not you will allow it to control you OR if you will confront and conquer it.

The purpose of this blog post is to present you with practical tips and tools that you can use to CONFRONT and CONQUER your limitations and limiting beliefs.

If you have decided to take strategic action to confront and conquer your limitations and limiting beliefs, congratulations! You have just made a decision that will ultimately change the trajectory of your life. Because now, you are about to WORK to transform your mindset.

By implementing the following tips into your daily routine, you will begin to SEE results in your THINKING and in your overall perspective of your self, you circumstance and life itself.

What can you do to TRANSFORM your Mindset?

Meditation – You can find a number of guided and non-guided, verbal and subliminal an subliminal meditations and visualization exercises on YouTube for a variety of topics such as anxiety, stress, depression, mental or emotional healing, relaxation, energy boosting, self-love and confidence, client attraction and so much more!

Affirm Yourself – Affirmations can be extremely powerful IF you know how to utilize them in a way that will work for YOU. This is important, because many people just think of affirmations as a cliche’ quote that sounds good on the back of a book or as your caption for your Instagram and Facebook post. But, affirmations are so POWERFUL when you put them to work!

Here are a few ways you can get AFFIRMATIONS to work for you:

  • Choose 5 to 10 affirmations to write and speak out loud; with conviction/enthusiasm DAILY
  • Create affirmation Post IT Notes and to stick on your bathroom mirror
  • Download the Sticky Note app & post affirmations on your Laptop and Cellphone screen savers
  • Hack your social media news feeds by follow multiple pages that post multiple affirmations throughout the day
  • Listen to affirmations while meditating AND as you sleep *there are 8 hr affirmations on YouTube* This is a great way to re-program and transform your mind (subliminal) without having to do anything but SLEEP!

Move – Get your body moving! And while you do so, affirm yourself! You can do this a variety of way; but I’ll share what I do: I go to the gym, if I have a lot on my mind and I walk a mile around the track. As I walk, I rehearse the affirmations (goals) that I write out daily as I walk. If I’m feel low confidence, I affirm myself with affirmations specific to confidence. Sometimes I pray as I walk. Prayer is also a form of meditation.

Often times, when I’m battling thoughts of anxiety or depression, I go for a walk in the park and affirm myself. This way, I’m getting that Vitamin D and being around people without having one on one contact or having to socialize helps me during those times vs shutting myself indoors or finding comfort in my bed sheets. All I’m saying is, FIND what works for you and do it consistently.

Journal – This is a great way to clear your mind. You can make a list, you can keep it short or you can keeping writing until you feel a sense of clarity or relief. There doesn’t have to be any particular rule or format to follow. The awesome thing about it, is that it works.

Read self-help, personal growth and development books on Mindset. Authors and Experts I recommend studying are: Brian Tracy, Bob Proctor and Dr Carol Dweck. I also have a book called Empower You! Mindset Transformation: A Daily Devotional for the Mind that is a 70 Day Devotional geared towards shifting and shaping your mindset from a negative mindset to a positive, success “growth” mindset. Inside my book, I include a full list of authors/experts and books on mindset, success and personal development, that I have read and studied. In fact, everything that I share with you is based on what I have learned and applied to my own life.

My best advice is to choose multiple of these to try and begin rotating them throughout your week. Let’s say you choose to start meditating and journaling. You don’t have to meditate or journal every day.

By implementing a few of these activities into your daily routine, I believe that you will begin to not only become more self-aware, but you will develop a greater peace of mind, a positive success “growth” mindset and a more optimistic perspective in life!