Why It’s Okay to Have Bad Days (A lesson on Perspective)

It’s okay to sometimes be like, “I’m having a bad day,  I’m not feeling like myself” and just be.

This does not mean that you stay there. The key is being self-aware and mindful. Being able to acknowledge that, “this is where I am, it’s not where I wanted to be and this is not where I will stay, but right now, in this moment, this is where I am, this is how I feel and it is okay. Because I know that I am and that I will be okay.”

I haven’t always thought this way. And, often would disregard the quote that says “It’s okay not to be okay.” I’d think to myself, “what do you mean it’s okay?” But, life experiences has since shifted my perspective on this a bit.

Happiness is a choice..

I wholeheartedly believe that our own personal happiness is a choice. And, that it is up to us, whether or not, we allow people, things and circumstances to influence our overall happiness. This, accompanied by the idea that our ability to maintain a positive success “growth” mindset is key to our overall happiness and success in life. However, I have learned through various experiences over the past few years, that life is made up of a series of processes and levels.

Stick with me..

For those of us who are complex, we may need to be extra patient with ourselves when it comes to our personal growth and development, because an essential part of growth is process. Sometimes, going through the process is uncomfortable. Sometimes, it feels like nothing is happening, or as if no progress is being made. But, to endure, we must understand that it is all a part of the process. And, that process does not look the same for everybody.

Your process might not look like my process and that is okay.

During the process, you may have a moment or even an entire day where you are just not okay. And, it seems like in the world of personal development, that we’re taught that we should do things that will promote positivity and a shift in our emotions or mindset, while we are in a negative mental place. I absolutely agree with this.. However, today, I want to share an idea..

That sometimes, an essential part of our PROCESS may be to do nothing at all, but simply observe.

Be mindful and observe HOW you feel, identify WHY, what or who influenced you to feel some type of way and just be.. in the moment.

Simply observe. Allow yourself to FEEL the emotion.

Acknowledge the feeling, without adding or subtracting it’s value.

Know that the FEELING does not have to last forever if you don’t want it to. Because yes, YOU do have a choice to be or not to be happy. You CAN shift your focus and intentionally focus on things that bring you joy and happiness; to SHIFT your feeling (mood), attitude or perspective.

Remember.. that it is okay, to simply observe.

If it happens to be a part of your process, it’s okay.

Don’t feel as if you have to meditate, chant, or baptize yourself in affirmations IF you feel as if you need a minute to just hit the pause button and simply BE in the moment. Yes, even with the negative feelings/emotions.

I feel as if this take on mindset and dealing with negative emotions is taboo to some, but it’s real. Most times the meditation, prayer, affirmations, etc. will work. But, every now and then, you may discover that you just need to be mindful and ride it out.

In the process, as you observe, you remain open to lessons you can learn and perspective shifts can take place, simply because you are still.

How to Reprogram Your Mind for Success

In the days we are living in now, it is beneficial, now more than ever before, to have a healthy mindset. Soo many people are dealing with mental health challenges such as depression and anxiety. As a mental health advocate, and someone who has worked in the field with both children, teenagers and adults, I’ve seen how imperative it is to develop healthy habits that will support and influence positive mental and emotional health.

There are things that we all should be doing on a consistent basis to create and maintain a healthy life balance; mental, emotional, physical, spiritual and financial. Today, I want to tackle mental and emotional health.. many of which will have a positive effect on your life physically, spiritually and financially as well.

Today, I am going to share with you 2 things that you can START doing NOW, to reprogram your mind for success in every area of your life. As always, these tips are most effective when you do them consistantly. By reprogramming your mindset, you can: Become more confident, develop a positive success mindset and become more aware and open to opportunities you would be closed off to otherwise.

2 Ways to Start Reprogramming Your Mind Now

1

Get a sheet of paper and fold it in half, hot dog style. On the left half, MAKE A LIST of your most common/reoccurring negative thoughts about yourself AND about your life.

THEN, for each negative thought or limiting belief, CREATE a positive affirmation and write it directly across from the negative thought, on the right side. READ through your list, first the negative and then the positive, line by line, EVERYDAY. This will help enhance your awareness. After awhile, you will begin to become aware of the thought as soon as it crosses your mind. WHEN this happens, be sure to pause, acknowledge the thought and then replace it with the positive affirmation. SPEAK the affirmation aloud with authority and conviction. You may not believe the affirmation in the beginning, but over time, you will.

A huge part of changing or shifting your mindset, so you can change your life IS shifting your perspective of life’s circumstances. BUT this exercise will help you to SHIFT your perspective of yourself first. And why not? When, you ARE The creator of your reality, as God has blessed you with freedom of choice, right?

2

LISTEN to positive affirmations while you are asleep. Start by doing a 5 or 10 minute meditation, or longer if you’d like, before you drift off to sleep. After your meditation, set your affirmations to play while you sleep throughout the night.This is great accompanied by binaural beats. Lastly, when you awake, meditate for 5 to 10 minutes.

When doing this step, I encourage you to create a YouTube playlist. That way you can choose specific guided meditations and affirmations to listen to and can put them in the order you like and it will be ready to go when you are. You can always create multiple playlists or add/remove whenever you want, as amazing meditations are added to YouTube often. Also, when you hit play from within the playlist you won’t have to worry about it stopping after the first video finishes.

In our daily lives, we operate using our CONSCIOUS mind. However, our SUBCONSCIOUS mind is the driving force behind what we think and do habitually. So, we want to REPROGRAM our subconsious mind to develope healthy thinking and living habits. By listenting to positive affirmations while you sleep, your subconcious mind is doing all the heavy lifting, reprogramming itself.

These are by far the TOP 2 strategies I recommend when it comes to reprogramming your mindset. You will not only begin to THINK better, but you will begin to FEEL better about yourself and about your life as well. Remember, when you change your mindset, you can change your life!

Thanks for reading! Please share with someone who can use this information today.

How to Unplug and Hit Reset on 2020

You said 2020 was going to be your year . The year you will finally take a leap of faith and pursue your dreams. But so far, most of us wish we could unplug 2020, wait 20 seconds and plug it back in again. I mean, on top of our own excuses, Jan – March alone has given us a few more reason to feel discourage and to procrastinate.

But, I encourage you to consider this..

You CAN unplug and hit the reset button on 2020.

Yes, you read that right. You can unplug and hit the reset button on 2020.. It begins with YOU make a conscious decision to SHIFT your mindset.

You can shift your MINDSET by:

1) Changing your focus. Focus more on the positive things in life and less on the negative .

HOW:

  • Set limits. LIMIT the amount of time you allow yourself to indulge in the news via social media and television.
  • While practicing social distancing, THINK about the individuals and environments in your life that are TOXIC and consider how you have distance yourself from those people or environments even after this current challenge has calmed.
  • JOURNAL daily to help you release, become aware of and to process your thoughts and emotions.
  • MEDITATE daily to help gain CLARITY and CONTROL aka AWARENESS of your thoughts. That way, you will recognize when negative thoughts bombard your mind and then replace it with a positive thought. And then, in that moment, continue to meditate on that positive thought.

Shifting your mindset is really just shifting your focus, by shifting your thoughts, over and over again. It sounds like an easy concept at surface level, but please hear me on this.. It takes work. It takes consistantcy. Sometimes, you have to do the DIRTY work to gain leverage over NEGATIVE thoughts.

If you find yourself struggle with the same negative thoughts/limiting beliefs, here’s what I suggest you do:

  1. Make a list of reoccurring negative thoughts and limiting beliefs
  2. For each thought/belief, write down a positive AFFIRMATION that you will remember. Write out that affirmation EVERY day for the next 21 days.
  3. Every time that negative thought or belief comes to mind, repeat the affirmation to yourself 10 times. When your first starting at, I encourage quoting the affirmation out load when possible. If the negative thought or limiting belief is about YOU specifically, rather than a particular situation/scenario, practice quoting the affirmations to yourself as you look at your reflection in the mirror. Another idea you can try; record yourself repeating the affirmations 10+ times and then listen to the recordings as you meditate (use headphones for best experience).

The more you do this, the EASIER it will become to RECOGNIZE (awareness) the negative thoughts/limiting beliefs and to COMBAT it.

To hit the RESET button on 2020, we must shift our THINKING/PERSPECTIVE of ourselves and of 2020.. IF you shift your mindset, you’ll be able to see the OPPORTUNITIES that may come as a result of the challenges we have and currently are facing. For example, many people have had a SIDE-HUSTLE or business idea that they’ve been wanting to start, but have yet to start because of their limiting belief that they CAN’T because they don’t have enough time. Those who have shifted there focus enough to see an opportunity have already started working on their business idea because they SEE the opportunity of TIME. Even if temporary, they have time NOW to START and to strategize a plan that will allow them to continue their pursuit AFTER things begin to return back to normal.

The fact is, we are living in chaotic, uncomfortable and uncertain times. BUT, even in this there is still HOPE and OPPORTUNITY. If you make the decide to shift your mindset, you will see it.

Thanks for reading! Like, Share, Comment & Tag a Friend who needs this encouragement today.

Conquer Your Limiting Beliefs

The human mind is a battle field. Every day we are tempted with negative thoughts and challenging situations. Some days we fight and conquer, other days we succumb. Many people live day to day without the realization that it is up to them to fight and conquer their limitations and limiting beliefs.

IF we want to SLAY our goals, we must make the conscious decision to confront and conquer our limitations and limiting beliefs, every day.

I am going to share with you HOW you can begin to SHIFT and TRANSFORM your mindset; from a negative to a positive success “growth” mindset, that will position you to confront and conquer your limitations and limiting belief.

A limitation is anything that serves as an excuse, to justify not taking strategic action to pursue your goals. Example: I don’t have enough time or money to start my business.

Limiting beliefs are negative thoughts that you allow to justify not taking strategic action to pursue your goals. Example: I am not good enough or qualified for people to take me seriously.

Here are the facts about Limitations & Limiting Beliefs:

We ALL battle negative thoughts and challenging situations everyday.

It is within our control to combat negative thoughts and to perceive our challenging situations in a positive way.

It is possible, but it also takes practice to attain and maintain a positive mindset and optimistic perspective in life.

A positive success “growth” mindset and an optimistic perspective in life WILL help you attract and take action (steps) that are in direct alignment with the goals you wish to achieve. It will also help you ATTRACT more positive opportunities and experiences into your life.

No matter how positive/optimistic you are, you will still confront negative thoughts and challenging situations. BUT you will be better equipt to GROW through it, because of the positive success “growth” mindset that you have.

A positive success “growth” mindset will allow you to SEE your challenges (negative situations), setbacks, etc. as a learning opportunity, as a setup in disguise, an opportunity to recalibrate, to realign and more.

You decide, each time you are faced with a negative thought or challenging situation, whether or not you will allow it to control you OR if you will confront and conquer it.

The purpose of this blog post is to present you with practical tips and tools that you can use to CONFRONT and CONQUER your limitations and limiting beliefs.

If you have decided to take strategic action to confront and conquer your limitations and limiting beliefs, congratulations! You have just made a decision that will ultimately change the trajectory of your life. Because now, you are about to WORK to transform your mindset.

By implementing the following tips into your daily routine, you will begin to SEE results in your THINKING and in your overall perspective of your self, you circumstance and life itself.

What can you do to TRANSFORM your Mindset?

Meditation – You can find a number of guided and non-guided, verbal and subliminal an subliminal meditations and visualization exercises on YouTube for a variety of topics such as anxiety, stress, depression, mental or emotional healing, relaxation, energy boosting, self-love and confidence, client attraction and so much more!

Affirm Yourself – Affirmations can be extremely powerful IF you know how to utilize them in a way that will work for YOU. This is important, because many people just think of affirmations as a cliche’ quote that sounds good on the back of a book or as your caption for your Instagram and Facebook post. But, affirmations are so POWERFUL when you put them to work!

Here are a few ways you can get AFFIRMATIONS to work for you:

  • Choose 5 to 10 affirmations to write and speak out loud; with conviction/enthusiasm DAILY
  • Create affirmation Post IT Notes and to stick on your bathroom mirror
  • Download the Sticky Note app & post affirmations on your Laptop and Cellphone screen savers
  • Hack your social media news feeds by follow multiple pages that post multiple affirmations throughout the day
  • Listen to affirmations while meditating AND as you sleep *there are 8 hr affirmations on YouTube* This is a great way to re-program and transform your mind (subliminal) without having to do anything but SLEEP!

Move – Get your body moving! And while you do so, affirm yourself! You can do this a variety of way; but I’ll share what I do: I go to the gym, if I have a lot on my mind and I walk a mile around the track. As I walk, I rehearse the affirmations (goals) that I write out daily as I walk. If I’m feel low confidence, I affirm myself with affirmations specific to confidence. Sometimes I pray as I walk. Prayer is also a form of meditation.

Often times, when I’m battling thoughts of anxiety or depression, I go for a walk in the park and affirm myself. This way, I’m getting that Vitamin D and being around people without having one on one contact or having to socialize helps me during those times vs shutting myself indoors or finding comfort in my bed sheets. All I’m saying is, FIND what works for you and do it consistently.

Journal – This is a great way to clear your mind. You can make a list, you can keep it short or you can keeping writing until you feel a sense of clarity or relief. There doesn’t have to be any particular rule or format to follow. The awesome thing about it, is that it works.

Read self-help, personal growth and development books on Mindset. Authors and Experts I recommend studying are: Brian Tracy, Bob Proctor and Dr Carol Dweck. I also have a book called Empower You! Mindset Transformation: A Daily Devotional for the Mind that is a 70 Day Devotional geared towards shifting and shaping your mindset from a negative mindset to a positive, success “growth” mindset. Inside my book, I include a full list of authors/experts and books on mindset, success and personal development, that I have read and studied. In fact, everything that I share with you is based on what I have learned and applied to my own life.

My best advice is to choose multiple of these to try and begin rotating them throughout your week. Let’s say you choose to start meditating and journaling. You don’t have to meditate or journal every day.

By implementing a few of these activities into your daily routine, I believe that you will begin to not only become more self-aware, but you will develop a greater peace of mind, a positive success “growth” mindset and a more optimistic perspective in life!

How to Create an Affective Plan You Won’t Quit

A Goal Without a Plan is Just a Wish

It’s 2020 and you’re ready to start slaying your goals that you set at the start of the new year. Now, that you have your goals (destination), it’s time to figure out just how you’re going to get there. First, I want to commend you for taking the time to CREATE a plan. Because, so many people give up on their goals, because LIFE happens and often when we least expect it right? The good news is that with the RIGHT plan or strategy in place, we can no longer have an excuse not to keeping going when those inevitable setbacks and discouragements arise.

The prerequisite for creating an effective plan that you won’t quit is: 1) Knowing exactly what you want to achieve, 2) Setting a SMART goal and breaking it down into small action steps. Once you have done that, it is time to create a goal-slaying strategy.

Here is the breakdown on how to create your strategy.

1) For each goal you set, break it down it to small steps.

Example:

Goal – I have $1,000 saved specifically as spending for my Summer vacation.

Step 1) Create a Budget

Step 2 ) Open a savings account

Step 3) Set-up my bank account to automatically deduct $100 from each upcoming paycheck and deposit into a separate savings account until a total of $1,000 is saved.

2) For each step, identify ANY limitation and limiting belief that you can think of. These are any reasons why YOU would not complete that step.

Example:

Step 1) Limitation – I don’t know how much to set up my account to automatically deduct $100.

Instead of avoiding this step altogether, identify a few solutions or alternatives.

Limiting Belief – I don’t know if I can save enough money in time.

Example:

Possible Solution – Call customer support and ask for assistance setting up the account.

Possible Solution – Google “how to set up my account with (name of bank) to automatically deduct $100 on a recurring date.

Possible Solution – Go to local branch in person and request assistance in getting set up.

Alternative Belief – Write out goal(s) and affirmations daily: I am going on summer vacation with more than enough money to splurge.

Many people give up on their goals NOT because the goal is too big. They give up, because of a STEP that they were required to take along the way. Many of the steps you must take to accomplish your goals may be tangible like the example above. However, others will be much like this limiting belief…

Limiting Belief: I am not good enough OR I am not qualified.

Instead of giving in to the discouragement, let’s identify some solutions to this “problem feeling.”

First, acknowledge that your FEELING is VALID. It is justified. It’s okay to feel “not good enough” or “not qualified.” Then, realize that you can do something about it and decide that you will do something about it. The solutions or alternatives that you identify are the specific things that you can do about it.

Example:

1. Work with a coach or mentor. Can’t afford one? Check out SCORE or coaches who offer coaching pro-bono.

2. Read books written by experts in your field/topic to enhance your knowledge

3. Watch YouTube videos on the topic

4. Take certification courses or go back to school and get a degree

It is my hope that this post has opened your eyes to see opportunity where you may have previously seen setbacks. You CAN achieve your goals and live your dream. But, sometimes we get stuck, because we don’t have the right PLAN. The right plan will have you prepared for possible setbacks and discouragements, before you even begin. And you know what’s great about this type of plan? Whenever a new limitation or limiting belief (thought) presents itself, you can add it to your list and follow the same formula to identify a solution AKA another reason why it IS possible to keep going. If plan A doesn’t work, you move on to B, C, D, etc. until you find what works.

If you’d like help in getting clear on what you want to achieve, setting the right goal and creating the right plan, I am here to help. I have officially launched my Goal Success Strategy Sessions. Click HERE to learn more.

Thanks for reading my friend! Wishing you great success this week. Feel free to share your comments below. Happy Manifesting in 2020!